Just want to share my story so you will get an understanding of where I've been and where I'm going.
My journey started with 2 pink lil lines back in Nov. of 2007. I couldn't believe what I was looking at! I had to call my sister first to let her know since she was always pregnant herself. We were two weeks part! I then told my husband who was in complete shock. We had been talking about what ifs but were not trying. We were both beside ourselves as we went to his parents to tell them. My family pretty much knew by them since having 2 sisters, news travels fast! Everyone was over excited and we soon began planing a double baby shower, how fun would that be?? So life was great and moving right along. Then came our first doctors visit....
As I laid on the ultrasound table not knowing what to expect and what would happen next. She then confirms our pregnancy and gives us a picture of our baby. She then tells us our due date and how far along I am. I was confused because the dates weren't adding up, "I should be 2 weeks ahead of that" I old her. So it was off to the hallway to see the doctor again, but this time it was in her office. As Chris and I waited for her I just kept telling him something wasn't right. As we sat down the room was pretty quite, and then the words came" I'm sorry, there is no heart beat". I immediately burst out in tears and the rest was a blur. All I remember was my baby was dead and I had to have it removed by the end of the week.
I do remember walking out of her office and sobbing and having all of these women staring at me. I hated to have to make those dreaded phone calls to my mom and sister. I couldn't believe those words were coming out of my mouth! Chris left his car at the hospital and drove me home where I was met by family and friends. The next morning I woke up to the sound of my baby's voice saying "I love you mommy". I again start crying cause with the morning sun came the reality that I was no longer carrying my child. The next couple days came and included another trip to the doctor to make sure there still wasn't a heartbeat. I remember having to wait in the waiting room with my mom and husband and being surrounded by either pregnant women or new mommies. I couldn't stop crying and my mom asked if there was another place I could wait but they said sorry, there wasn't.
Friday came around and it was time for the D&C. Up till that point I had never heard the words missed miscarriage or D&C before, this was all so new to me. I had no idea what to expect. I put on my brave face and gave hugs and kisses as they rolled me down the hall. I can honestly say I can't remember the days following. One by one, my days started going by as the sadness got greater and greater......
My journey started with 2 pink lil lines back in Nov. of 2007. I couldn't believe what I was looking at! I had to call my sister first to let her know since she was always pregnant herself. We were two weeks part! I then told my husband who was in complete shock. We had been talking about what ifs but were not trying. We were both beside ourselves as we went to his parents to tell them. My family pretty much knew by them since having 2 sisters, news travels fast! Everyone was over excited and we soon began planing a double baby shower, how fun would that be?? So life was great and moving right along. Then came our first doctors visit....
As I laid on the ultrasound table not knowing what to expect and what would happen next. She then confirms our pregnancy and gives us a picture of our baby. She then tells us our due date and how far along I am. I was confused because the dates weren't adding up, "I should be 2 weeks ahead of that" I old her. So it was off to the hallway to see the doctor again, but this time it was in her office. As Chris and I waited for her I just kept telling him something wasn't right. As we sat down the room was pretty quite, and then the words came" I'm sorry, there is no heart beat". I immediately burst out in tears and the rest was a blur. All I remember was my baby was dead and I had to have it removed by the end of the week.
I do remember walking out of her office and sobbing and having all of these women staring at me. I hated to have to make those dreaded phone calls to my mom and sister. I couldn't believe those words were coming out of my mouth! Chris left his car at the hospital and drove me home where I was met by family and friends. The next morning I woke up to the sound of my baby's voice saying "I love you mommy". I again start crying cause with the morning sun came the reality that I was no longer carrying my child. The next couple days came and included another trip to the doctor to make sure there still wasn't a heartbeat. I remember having to wait in the waiting room with my mom and husband and being surrounded by either pregnant women or new mommies. I couldn't stop crying and my mom asked if there was another place I could wait but they said sorry, there wasn't.
Friday came around and it was time for the D&C. Up till that point I had never heard the words missed miscarriage or D&C before, this was all so new to me. I had no idea what to expect. I put on my brave face and gave hugs and kisses as they rolled me down the hall. I can honestly say I can't remember the days following. One by one, my days started going by as the sadness got greater and greater......
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